No.89

"New Year's Eve!"... "New Years, Adam!"

No.88

Gave up Christmas leftovers; Cold Turkey.

The One and Only Tim Vine (xv)

Piles of snow... get my drift?!

No.87

Wenceslas pizza; deep-pan, crisp and even.

No.86

Luke Skywalker felt Darth Vader’s presents.

No.85

Frankincense; like ordinary incense, but tactless.

The One and Only Tim Vine (xiv)

Had Christmas haircut; all the trimmings.

No.84

“I hate carol singing.”  ... Carol devastated.

No.83

“How long?!” called out the defendant.

No.82

Dog takes chemistry exam: Lab Test.

Leeds vs Millwall (a)

Battled hard, but lacking quality everywhere.

Spoiler Alert! Cool Runnings

They suck. They improve. They crash.

England vs Sweden (friendly)

"Tekkers", "Take a boo", "Worldy!". Sigh.

No.81

Water biscuit in helmet: safe cracker.

No.80

One dog at zoo= Shih Tzu.

The Comedy Stylings of Richard Wright (abridged)

High street bank for dogs: Bark-lays.

No.79

Surprised by bovine vicar. “Holy cow!”

No.78

Partridge responds to dare: “I’m game!”

Leeds vs Birmingham (h)

Not worth six words. Takeover please.

The One and Only Tim Vine (xiii)

Best cheese for disguising horses? Mascarpone

No. 77

Laziest Monty Python actor: Eric Idle.

No. 76

“No dog fouling!” says dog footballer.

No.75

Emmett Brown meets Connery. “Great Scot!”

Leeds vs Barnsley (h)

Bout time we beat those upstarts.

Spoiler Alert! Rocky (i ii iii iv v & Balboa)

Human punch bag: Improbable world champion!

No.74

Beavers are blocking the river? Dam!

The One and Only Tim Vine (xii)

Album of all my fights: Scrapbook.

No.73

French city that looks nice: Nice.

No.72

Clumsy tap dancer falls in sink.

No.71

Bum gains Cambridge degree; smart arse!

No.70

Craziness in moon’s ocean; lunar sea.

The One and Only Tim Vine (xi)

Advantages of easy origami are two-fold.

No.69

Legolas’s risk assessment: elf and safety.

Spoiler Alert! High School Musical

Singing jocks? Beautiful brainiacs?? Crème bruleè?!

No.68

Swansea welcome striker: Nice to Michu!

No.67

There's something fishy about Conor Sammon.

No.66

PLEEEEEEAAAAASE vote for me here. Thanks!

No.65

Othello ignores troublesome ensign. Tragedy averted.

The One and Only Tim Vine (x)

Detonated alphabet bomb could spell disaster.

No.64

Ginger wizard/ stoat hybrid: Ron Weasel-y

No.63

Pheasant comedian: game for a laugh

And/or (part 3)

Troubling relationship with mother threatens everything.

(Oedipus and/or Marty McFly) 

No.62

Strikers score five. Hansen bemoans defending.

100th Post Spectacular!

“...Toss me... Don’t tell the elf.”

No.61

John steals small dogs; Jack rustles.

No.60

Offered flan around GMTV: “Quiche, Lorraine?”

Spoiler Alert! Lord of the Rings Trilogy.

Ring chucked into volcano. Job done.

No.59

Red Rum stages a farce; horseplay.

The One and Only Tim Vine (ix)

Conjunctivitis.com; a site for sore eyes.

No.58

Prefers 100m to the marathon. Racist.

Leeds vs Preston (a)

Win, but still need 'marquee' signings.

No.57

'L' means ‘Learner’. GB= Getting Better?!

No.56

Scary British Olympians cause heebie GBs.

No.55

Mystery Gang win Olympics. Medalling kids!

Leeds vs Torquay (a)

Quality finishing Ross... please don't go!

No.54

“I’ll admit; I’m lost.” said Wally.

Leeds vs Bodmin (a)

Four past him. No mean feat.

No.53

Happy tin from the states; American.

Leeds vs Tavistock (a)

White, Green, OG, Rogers, Poleon, Thompson.

No.52

Australian midfielder on fire; Jacob burns!

And/or (part 2)

His only superpower is vast wealth 

(Ironman and/or Batman)

No.51

Sensitive, yet tactile person. Very touchy!

No.50

Homer's bread is completely undercooked: "D'oh!"

No.49

Henry VIII always kept hat receipts.

Spoiler Alert: Jurassic Park Trilogy

Dinosaurs evaded (Film two is rubbish)

No.48

Hereditary diarrhoea runs in your genes.

The One and Only Tim Vine (viii)

Sore lips go past: "Hi chaps!"

No.47

Nearly asleep. Need toilet. Riskin' it.

And/or (part 1)

Genealogy obsessed, ruthless, death fearing dictator.

(Voldemort and/or Hitler)

No.46

July? No I tell the truth.

Spoiler Alert: Watership Down

Epic adventure. Brutal warfare... with rabbits.

No.45

Bloodthirsty, murderous, infant barber: Sweeney Toddler.

No.44

Loads of cakes at disco; abundance.

England vs Italy (take 2)

Written in stars... til we lost.

England vs Italy

"Joe Hart looks like Draco Malfoy."

No.43

Linford hurriedly leaves party: “Gotta run!”

No.42

Born. Plays X-Box. Dies... New Halo. 

The One and Only Tim Vine (vii)

Helter skelter addiction; a downward spiral.

No.41

“I’m not great at counting,” said Marc.

England vs Sweden

Hodgson= solid defence, few chances... erm...

No.40

Conscientious eunuch works his bollocks off.

No.39

Beautiful woman off work; she’s striking.

England vs France

Solid, steady, unspectacular blah blah blah.

Spoiler Alert: Back to the Future Trilogy

Past. Future. Past. Past-er. Present. End.

No.38

Snooker champion at Hogwarts? Harry potter.

No.37

Ventriloquist forgets his main prop. Dummy!

No.36

Frenetic experience on campsite. It’s intense.

The One and Only Tim Vine (vi)

The moving staircase debate is escalating.

No.35

Englebert Humperdinck. “OK... what’s a dinck?”

No.34

Pontypandy: the UK's biggest insurance blackspot.

Spoiler Alert: Titanic

“This ship can’t sink!”... It can.

No.33

Wooden performance from lead... in Pinocchio.

No.32

Email from Holy Spirit: a Godsend!

50th Post Spectacular!

"Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak! Thank you."

No.31

Piles: a pain in the arse.

No.30

I also procrastinate by making quizzes!

No.29

Johnson raises eyebrows. Ridsdale raises offer...

No.28

Didn’t buy slippers; got cold feet.

No.27

Irritable chef finds his assistant grating.

No.26

Trial sees Belle jailed for bestiality.

The One and Only Tim Vine (v)

Russian dolls; so full of themselves!

No.25

"Six words isn't enough," said the

Leeds vs Leicester (h)

Fitting end to a horrible season.

No.24

Finger conspicuous at sore thumb convention.

No.23

Sandwich unfinished. Lunchtime ends. Foiled again.

No.22

Fat man. 40 Fags. Heavy smoker. 

No.21

Student of existentialism realises: “It’s pointless!”

Leeds vs Blackpool (a)

Most interesting part: fight in stand.

The One and Only Tim Vine (iv)

New ‘Oliver Twist' diet; it’s gruelling!

Leeds vs P'boro (h)

Dreaming?! Victory, and two for Billy!

No.20

Man hires stripper; takes down wallpaper.

Leeds vs Derby (h)

Considered not going. Wish I hadn't.

No.19

City’s Premiership invitation didn't say BYOB.

No.18

Cricket fans given tissues: Balmy Army!

No.17

Baddie captures Spiderman in giant bathtub.

No.16

Picnic on precarious slope: sausage rolls.

Leeds vs Watford (h)

Another completely gutless 'performance'. Season over.

The One and Only Tim Vine (iii)

Threw dog’s ball to Aberdeen. Far-fetched?!

No.15

Ninja starves playing hide and seek.

No.14

Recluse at University; forever a loan.

No.13

Jesus on Broadway: act of God.

No.12

Mars amazes scientists. Galaxy tastes better.

Leeds vs Forest (h)

More Forest goals than words here.

No.11

Vindaloo’s revenge.  Cushioned loo roll required.

Leeds vs West Ham (h)

LATE equaliser. Draw feels like defeat.

The One and Only Tim Vine (ii)

Handsome man sprints by. He’s dashing!

No.10

To track down baddies, Sherlock homes.

Leeds vs Boro (a)

Comprehensive victory. Play-off charge starts here(?)

No.9

Should of listened in grammar lessons.

No.8

Crocodile swallows hand; Captain gets hook.

No.7

Friar Laurence butts out. Star-crossed livers.

Leeds vs Soton (h)

Battered 'em for 90. Somehow lost.

The one and only Tim Vine (i)

Black Beauty; he's a dark horse.

No.6

Pancake stuck to roof. Useless tosser!

Leeds vs Pompey (a)

Start of being 'difficult to beat'?

No.5

Lightning scar on Longbottom. Harry who?

Leeds vs Doncaster (h)

Fantastic comeback. More intriguing: tunnel fracas!

Leeds vs Coventry (a)

Outplayed by bottom team. Redfearn out.

No.4

Says: “Beautiful baby!” Thinks: ‘Gollum's doppelgänger.’

No.3

Seven deadly sins: done. What next?

No.2

Toothbrush: check. Central European chap: Czech...

No.1

New challenge. Less words. Bring it!

The Purpose

So, in case you didn't know, I write 50 word stories. It's like 'my thing'.  If you've never come across my mini saga blog, you can see it here.

When I was scouring the web one day, for other people's mini sagas (so that I could read them and say "Mine are better than that!") I came across a page entitled 6 word stories.

My first thought was: there is now way you can do stories in 6 words. But apparently you can! Ernest Hemingway kicked it off, (*urban myth warning*) by betting a friend that he could. The result was fairly impressive:

For Sale; Baby shoes. Never Worn.

Beginning, middle, end. Inspires feelings. Brilliant, as far as I'm concerned. But that was Hemingway! Surely normal people can't! Again, apparently they can! Here are a couple that I liked (which I found on this site)

Emo totally devastated by spilt milk.

and

"Uh oh." said the heart surgeon.

Both brilliant for different reasons. And for much the same reasons that I started my 50 word story blog, here comes the 6 word version.

So if you sometimes find 50 words just too long, this is the place for you! (I promise, this is the only post in which I will ramble. 6 words only from now on!)

Come back soon!